Yesterday, I fought as much as I could to resist and not break the cycle. I got dressed up to hit that binge-store-frenzy, then I stopped and realized that’s not what I want. I’m over this, right?! Wrong. So I went back home, changed into my yoga pants and watched some YouTube videos. Then again, it hit me harder than before – You are never going to change. People don’t change. This is who you are and who you’ll be for the rest of your misery life. You will be a loser forever.
Disorders, to be exact. I’ve been through anorexia; now I’m a binge eater combined with bulimic. The last time I binged was yesterday. The last time I purged was two days ago. My throat hurt terribly, and I hated myself afterward. Six plus years of this constant battle.
I’m not good at introducing myself because I think there isn’t anything interesting about me. I constantly think I’m not good enough and I can’t think of any rational reason why anyone would be interested in my being. Now that you know how self-consciousness little creature I am, you may better understand why I created this blog – to learn to love body and to help all of you to love yours.